The Wurst Affront, Hey

For days now, I have been defending free speech and the right of European publications to print cartoons depicting Mohammed. I've condemned the death and destruction that has been carried out by raging protesters disturbed by the images.

Now, I'm faced with a painful reality.

As a Cheesehead, I was forced to confront my own hypocrisy when degrading images of Vince Lombardi surfaced.

Free speech be damned.

To depict Vince in such a shameful fashion was an intentional affront, indicative of the disrespect that the non-Cheesehead world has for faithful Cheeseheads and our culture.

Let's face it.

Non-Cheeseheads exhibit an absolutely unacceptable insolence toward those of us donning foam wedges of cheese on our heads. This permeating, poisonsous disrespect has made peaceful co-existence nearly impossible. Is it any wonder that Cheeseheads have lashed out?

Iowahawk reports on the outrageous images, and subsequent displays of outrage, that have gripped Packer Country.

He writes:

Seething Midwest Explodes Over Lombardi Cartoons

Green Bay, WI - Like a pot of bratwurst left unattended at a Lambeau Field pregame party, simmering tensions in the strife-torn Midwest boiled over once again today as rioting mobs of green-and-gold clad youth and plump farm wives rampaged through Wisconsin Denny’s and IHOPs, burning Texas toast and demanding apologies and extra half-and-half.

The spark igniting the latest tailgate hibachi of unrest: a Texas newsletter's publication of caricatures of legendary Green Bay Packers coach Vince Lombardi.


Cartoon that shocked Midwest


Protestors demonstrated against the images throughout the Badger State yesterday, with violent egging and cow-tipping incidents reported in Oconomowac, Pewaukee, Sheboygan, Ozaukee, Antigo, Oshkosh, Waubeno, Wauwautosa, Waunewoc, Wyocena, Waubeka, and Washawonamowackapeepee.

Some of the most dramatic skirmishes were centered around Kenosha, where a mob of masked snowmobilers invaded the Texas Roadhouse on I-94, briefly holding the margarita machine hostage. They were later seen storming the beverage department at Woodman's, where they purchased several cases of Point and a pack of Merit menthols, and later at the Brat Stop classic rock/sausage outlet, where they were reported angrily "boogie-ing out" on air guitar to featured entertainment Molly Hatchett.

But by far the fiercest demonstration took place in Green Bay's Lambeau Shrine parking lot where throngs of Packer faithful burned Texas flags and effigies of Roger Staubach as Lutheran pastors led them in chants of "Those who defame the Vince suck" and "Favre is Great." Many of the frenzied demonstrators were seen ritualistically beating themselves with mozzarella sticks.

..."While Wisconsin culture is tolerant compared to, say, Iowa, what many outsiders don't understand is that its ultimate taboo is graven images of Lombardi," said Nigel Rhys-Jones of Harvard's Institute of Primitive Anthropology. "The only Lombardi iconography allowed is allegorical, in throw blankets or needlepoint appliques, and must be purchase at craft fairs from chubby Lutheran women in windbreakers. For a Cowboy fan to make cartoons of the Vince is... let's just say the ultimate sacrilege."

Before one is quick to condemn the violence, one must understand the context. As Rhys-Jones explains, even tolerant Wisconsinites have their limits.

Many elements joined together to create the perfect storm.

The fact that the offensive images came out of Texas, home of the Cowboys, is key. Another critical point is that Packer fans have had to deal with their first losing season in recent memory. Adding to the unrest is the current limbo that Packer Backers find themselves. Will Brett return?

Take this hornet's nest and whack it with the utterly tasteless images of the venerated Vince Lombardi. Is it surprising that the Cheeseheads have reached their boiling point?

I respond with an unequivocal "NO!"

Adding to the Cheeseheads' pain, inciting their fondue pots to boil over, are Internet bloggers that are recklessly circulating images like the one posted by Iowahawk.


It sickens me.

I consider that drawing to be a personal attack on my beliefs, my culture, and all that I hold dear.

Again, you may ask, "What about free speech?"

I respond, "What about it?"

While I do condemn the more violent expressions of disapproval that my fellow wurst-loving Cheeseheads have engaged in, I can understand them.

If the turmoil that the degrading cartoons have wrought seems out of proportion and inappropriate to you, it is because YOU are culturally insensitive.

Yes, YOU.

YOU are wrong!

When CNN covers this explosive story, will the outlet display the offensive images?

Hopefully, it will rework the disclaimer that has accompanied all of its Mohammed cartoon stories.

CNN has chosen to not show the cartoons out of respect for Cheeseheads.