SNL: Gloria Allred

Nasim Pedrad portrayed Gloria Allred in the opening of the October 9th episode of Saturday Night Live.



Transcript

GLORIA ALLRED (Nasim Pedrad): Hello, and welcome to this addition of Ask Gloria Allred. I'm Gloria Allred.

This week, many of you have written or e-mailed to congratulate me on my recent press conference with Nicky Diaz. Nicky is the undocumented worker from Mexico who was employed by Meg Whitman, currently the Republican candidate for governor of California as a housekeeper.

While working for the Whitmans, Nicky suffered continuous emotional abuse and was forced to perform a series of horrendous and degrading tasks, from sorting and washing laundry to vacuuming carpets and dusting venetian blinds, all under the threat that if she did not perform these sickening acts they would not pay her.

It is a heart-wrenching story and many of you thanked me for bringing it to the nation's attention. But some have questions.

For example, Paul from Indianapolis asks:

'As her attorney, how could you let Ms. Diaz announce on television that she is in the country illegally? Because of your reckless attention-seeking, won't she be arrested and deported?'

That's a good question, Paul. I hadn't really thought about it. I'm going to recommend that Nicky hire a good immigration lawyer.

Karen from Boston asks:

'I saw your latest freak-show press conference with Ms. Diaz, and I have to ask: Is there anything you won't do to push your butt-ugly mug in front of a camera?'

Another good question, Karen. I have to think about that, but I guess my answer would be no.

Steven from New Orleans asks:

'Why do you talk so loud? Or does it just seem that way, because your manner is so grating?'

Probably a bit of both, Steven. I'm naturally a very pushy person and find that by talking loudly people are forced to listen to me even if they would prefer not to.

Kevin from Fort Collins, Colorado asks:

'Tell me, Gloria. Has a more disgusting creature than yourself ever walked the face of the earth?'

Wow. A lot of good questions tonight. I don't know the answer, Kevin. I suppose since man in his present form has been around for about 250,000 years there must have been somebody, but I really can't say for sure.

Denise from Nashville asks:

'When you die, Gloria, and you go instantly to Hell, which I think we can all agree will absolutely happen -- will you just burn with all the other ambulance-chasers who spent their lives bringing misery into the world, or will there be a special ring or level of Hell just for you?'

Oh my, Denise, that is such a profound question! Who knows? All I can say is I sincerely hope so. That would be nice.

Well, that's it for tonight's show. We'll see you next week. Until then, please pay attention to me, and Live from New York, it's Saturday Night.

Video.



The country is deeply divided, but I think we can find common ground here.