Sarah Shay

UPDATE, January 6, 2010: Mom warned kids not to tell, police say

After one child got sick and threw up from drinking alcohol at a birthday sleepover, the Kewaskum mother hosting the party and providing the drinks at a West Bend hotel told other children - girls and boys ages 11 to 14 - not to tell their parents about the booze, according to police reports released Wednesday.

One child later told a police officer that she felt threatened by Sarah A. Shay's statement.

"Sarah did tell us not to say anything to anyone or we would be sad if we did," the child says in a statement to police.

Shay, 36, served bottles of Mike's Hard Lemonade to her 12-year-old daughter, a son and 10 other children as the group rode in a limousine from Kewaskum Middle School to West Bend on Dec. 18, according to the reports. Shay drank from her bottle as other bottles were passed among the children.

...A handful of the children drank enough to get sick and vomit, police reports say. Shay initially told officers that the children got sick after drinking soda.

The police reports indicate that Shay did not tell parents of the 10 children attending the party that she would serve alcohol. Shay did not disclose that there would be boys and girls at the sleepover in one hotel room.

A handwritten note Shay gave to one parent says Shay, her daughter and the other parent's daughter would be the only ones staying in the room, according to police. The note says Shay rented a second room for her son and two of his friends and that they would be supervised by Shay's brother.

...Shay's brother and her parents showed up briefly that evening with pizzas, reports say. Two bottles of champagne and more Mike's Hard Lemonade also were brought into the hotel about that time.

Some children told police that they did not drink while the other adults were present. Other children told officers that they hid bottles under towels if one of the other adults was around.

Shay took the champagne to the hotel room and left them unattended on a counter, reports say. Children then drank the champagne.

No other adult stayed overnight with the children. Shay and at least a dozen minors crowded into the one room and some of the children told officers that they stayed awake all night playing games because there was no place for everyone to sleep.

One game included blowing air into condoms, then tossing them around the room like balloons, Shay's daughter told an officer. "No one had sex," the girl says in a statement.

This is a birthday party for a 12-year-old!

What a wholesome event! No one had sex!
_______________

Sarah Shay planned a party for her daughter's 12th birthday.

She went all out. Shay treated the 10 partygoers, ages 11 to 14, to an overnight stay at the West Bend Hampton Inn Hotel. There was a limo, swimming, and CHAMPAGNE AND MIKE'S HARD LEMONADE.

I call that a dangerous mix.

From the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel:

A 36-year-old Kewaskum mother is accused of serving champagne and Mike's Hard Lemonade to 10 children - ages 11 to 14 - attending a sleepover birthday party for her 12-year-old daughter at a West Bend hotel, police said Tuesday.

Sarah A. Shay has been given 10 municipal citations accusing her of serving alcoholic beverages to minors at the Dec. 18 party at Hampton Inn Hotel, 1975 S. 18th Ave., Police Chief Kenneth Meuler said in a news release Tuesday. Shay faces a fine of $681 on each of the citations.

All of the children reside in the Kewaskum School District, Lt. Paul Pokorski said. None of the children was hospitalized for treatment of illness resulting from ingesting alcohol, Pokorski said.

..."Our investigation revealed that on the way to the hotel and while at the hotel, Ms. Shay served the children champagne and Mike's Hard Lemonade," the statement says.

..."The children include one 11-year-old, three 12-year-olds, four 13-year-olds, and two 14-year-olds. None of these children's parents had any prior knowledge that alcohol would be served to their children."

From TMJ 4:

The manager at the hotel told Today's TMJ4 that the group left the hotel room a mess, and that hotel employees confronted Shay about the alcohol. She allegedly told them it was for the adults, but police said she was the only adult there.

This isn't just an error in judgment. This is really bad parenting.

Shay was responsible for 10 children. Their parents entrusted Shay with their children's care.

Alcohol at a 12-year-old's birthday party, served by the parent supervising the event?

What was she thinking? She's lucky that none of the children were injured, especially given that they were swimming.

This really was a recipe for disaster. Shay lucked out.

I suppose Shay thinks of herself as a "cool mom."

She's not. She broke the law. She's irresponsible. She encouraged and enabled utterly inappropriate behavior.

I hope authorities will be doing a thorough investigation of Shay. It certainly seems like she isn't up to her role as a parent. Her daughter is at risk.

Maybe in the long run this is a good thing. Maybe the attention this case is receiving will result in Shay getting whatever assistance she needs to shape up. At the very least, I hope some responsible adults intervene for her daughter's sake. The girl currently isn't on a path that bodes well for her future.

Although the kids' parents didn't know the swimming party would also be a drinking party, I do wonder if there were any signals that Shay was planning this sort of event. Did the children know ahead of time that alcohol would be provided? If so, it's unfortunate that at least one didn't inform a parent before the party.

And what about the partygoers' parents? Were they comfortable with Shay supervising their kids? If they gave their children permission to attend the party, then they must have been confident that they would be adequately supervised, right?

Was this totally out of character for Shay?

There are a lot of unanswered questions.

What we do know is that the mother hosting this birthday party for her 12-year-old daughter gave alcohol to 10 chilren, ages 11 to 14 years old.

That's against the law. It's being a bad parent.

Although the 10 citations slap Shay with a hefty fine as punishment, I don't think that really addresses the problem.

Video.