Letterman: Top Ten Reasons Brett Favre Came Out of Retirement

UPDATE, October 12, 2010: TOP TEN BRETT FAVRE EXCUSES
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From Late Show with David Letterman, August 19, 2009:

DAVID LETTERMAN: Category tonight -- Top Ten reasons Brett Favre has come out of retirement.

We talked about this earlier. Thirty-nine-year-old quarterback Brett Favre unretired again and signed to play for the Minnesota Vikings.

As you know, started his NFL career, I believe, with the Atlanta Falcons. They traded him to the Green Bay Packers where he won a Super Bowl and was a revered legend in Green Bay. And everybody said when you're done, don't play anyplace else. That's where you made your name and the people in Green Bay love you forever.

Then he goes to New York to play for the Jets. That didn't work out and he's retiring again. He sat right here on the show one night and I said, 'Is it true you're not retired?' And he took a swing at me. And shortly thereafter he entered a convent.

But... And now, the most heinous thing he could have done-- he's playing for the hated rival Minnesota Vikings. So he signed there.

TOP TEN REASONS BRETT FAVRE CAME OUT OF RETIREMENT

10. Blew his savings on a two-day taco binge

9. No reason to stay home every day now that "Guiding Light" has been cancelled

8. Worried Obama's Death Panels might try to take him out

7. In this economy, someone offers a job, you grab it

6. Wants to raise and then dash hopes of another city's fans

5. Couldn't take another trip to Pottery Barn with his wife

4. Lured by a lucrative contract and free jar of Icy Hot

3. "Concussions made me krazy!"

2. Who could resist chance to spend glorious winter in Minnesota?

1. Oh oh, wait. He just retired again