Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Obama's Clean Power Plan: Details

Details of Obama's Plan:


  • Immediate removal of smokestacks atop White House


  • Designates team of workers to cool down planet’s hottest surfaces with damp towels and washcloths


  • Increases wind by 80 million gusts


  • Provides state governments with template for lawsuit to file in federal court


  • Sets aside a couple ecosystems to decimate every few years to release repressed environmentally destructive energy


  • Creates $500 tax credit for homeowners who install rooftop nuclear reactors


  • Encourages citizens to choose more environmentally friendly method of suicide than running car in garage


  • Serves as major legacy-builder for Obama until presidential system is forgotten in catastrophic, drought-ravaged Black Times beginning in 2047


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