Thursday, November 12, 2015

Jimmy Fallon, Billy Crystal: 'Hillary and Bernie Sanders Are So Old' Jokes

About a month ago, Jay Leno assisted Jimmy Fallon with his monologue.

Fallon received some help on Wednesday night, this time from Billy Crystal.

JIMMY FALLON: The Democrats seem to be a little worried about their candidates as well. In fact, they seem most worried about appealing to younger voters, because both of the leading Democratic candidates are over 65. A lot of people are saying Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton might be too old to be president. And it's true, I mean, Bernie Sanders is so old...

AUDIENCE: How old is he?

FALLON: Bernie Sanders is so old he needs 12 Viagras to go up in the polls. Hillary Clinton, she's no spring chicken either. She is old.

AUDIENCE: How old is she?

FALLON: She's so old her first pantsuit was made by Betsy Ross. She bought it at Ann Taylor Cave.

She's so old... [Cough] You know what? I'm sorry. I have a little tickle in my throat. I think I might need a lozenge. Could someone tag in for me please? Thank you.

[Enter Billy Crystal]

BILLY CRYSTAL: Boy, that Bernie Sanders sure is old.

AUDIENCE: How old is he?

CRYSTAL: He's so old he thinks the trickle down theory is about him urinating. 'This has got to stop!'

He's so old he remembers when Ol' Dirty Bastard was just Dirty Bastard.

And Hillary's so old when she hears 2016 she yells, 'BINGO.'

She's so old her first political scandal was deleting all her telegraph messages.

She's so old she remembers when Jimmy Fallon had hands.

FALLON: Thank you very much, Billy. Thank you. I appreciate it. I'm going to tag back in. Hillary's so old she's not running for president, she's mall walking for it.


CRYSTAL: And Bernie Sanders is so old...

FALLON: How old is he?

CRYSTAL: He tucks his testicles into his sock.

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