Joe Biden and Jay Leno

Joe Biden was Jay Leno's guest on Friday's Tonight Show.

It's the first time he's been on the show since he became vice president.

Leno introduced Biden by saying, "I'm a big fan of this gentleman."

No surprise there.

They talked about Biden's recent trip to Iraq. Biden said he's made 17 trips there. He noted, "We're making progress. Violent acts are down considerably."

Of course, Biden made no mention of his opposition to the surge that turned things around in Iraq. He certainly didn't reiterate Obama's remark that Iraq is a "dumb war."

Biden told a story about "one of the coolest things that happened" in his career, one of the half dozen things that he's enjoyed the most. On the 4th of July, he swore in soldiers to become American citizens.

BIDEN: These guys all joined the United States Army, Navy, Marine Corps. Some had been shot. Some had been killed and weren't able to be there. All to be sworn in as a U.S. citizen. And we did it in Saddam's palace.

That's a very nice story.

But Biden did say a sentence that the Left would have jumped all over if President Bush had said it.

"Some had been killed and weren't able to be there."

No kidding. If the soldiers were killed, of course they wouldn't attend the swearing-in ceremony.

That double standard again.

Leno asked Biden when the withdrawal will be.

Biden bragged about all the troops that have already left, as if no withdrawals were previously scheduled by the Bush administration, as if all were initiated by the Obama administration.

Biden promised, "By the end of next year, we'll not have any troops there. And that's because the president insisted that happen, and we're gonna keep that commitment."

Leno didn't ask why the Obama administration is failing to keep tons of its commitments. He gave Biden a pass.

Leno asked Biden if he minds being "fodder for late night TV" and if he watches.

BIDEN: I do watch it. But to be honest with you, I'm gonna get in trouble here, I mostly watch you.

LENO: Well, that's very good.

BIDEN: And I don't mind you making fun of me. There's some other guys I'm not crazy about making fun of me.

I think Biden lost the Letterman vote with that bit of alleged honesty regarding his TV viewing habits.

Leno brought up Biden's "salty language." He asked if Obama complains about it.

BIDEN: Look, I told the president, swear to God, I told the president two things when he asked me for the job. I said, 'Just two conditions, Mr. President. I'm not going to wear any funny hats, and I'm not changing my brand.' And I kept my promise.

Do you believe that conversation took place?

I have doubts.

Here's video of Biden talking about the Russian spy swap:

JAY LENO: Hey, I want to ask you about this Russian spy swap. We traded ten for four. Now I know our math skills are not as good as they should be but that doesn't seem fair. Why did we trade ten for four?

JOE BIDEN: Well, we got back four really good ones. Um, and uh, the ten, uh, they've been here a long time, but they hadn't done much.

LENO: Are they just sort of like moles. They just sort of plant people here, and say see what you can find out, or they come with a specific mission? You're gonna go work for Lockheed, or you're gonna work...?

BIDEN: The former.

LENO: Yeah, OK. Now show this Russian woman here.

(Shows photo of Russian spy)

Let me ask you something. And you would know this, Mr. Vice President. Do we have any spies that hot?

BIDEN: Let me make it clear. It wasn't my idea to send her back.

Leno applauded and laughed as if Biden had delivered one of the most hilarious lines he'd ever heard. It was a bit much.

Biden then stumbled around. He stammered, as if struggling to come up with another punch line.

I thought it was kind of creepy. The guy is a heartbeat away from the presidency and he sounds like a dirty old man.

BIDEN: Um, um, um, um, anyway. I thought maybe they'd take Rush Limbaugh or something. That would've been a good, you know, good move.

That was really lame.

Leno didn't challenge Biden on anything. There were no remotely tough questions.

No surprises.

Just another typical lib love fest.
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Watch the full interview.

Part 1: Biden talks trip to Iraq and GE exec fainting during his speech.

Part 2: Biden talks Gen. McChrystal.

Part 3: Biden talks Gulf oil spill.